Hindu Mommy

March 28, 2007

Top 21 Things Indians say when they return to India from the U.S.

Filed under: Funny,Indians in US — hindumommy @ 11:02 pm

21.Tries to use credit cards in a road side hotel.

20. Drinks and carries mineral water and always speaks of being health conscious.

19 .Sprays deodorant so that he doesn’t need to take bath.

18. Sneezes and says ‘Excuse me’.

17. Says “Hey” instead of “Hi”, “Yoghurt” instead of “Curds”, “Cab” instead of “Taxi”, “Trunk” of “Dicky” for a car trunk, “Candy” instead of “Chocolate”,”Cookie” instead of “Biscuit” , “got to go” instead of “Have to go”.

Says “Oh” instead of “Zero”, (for 704, he will say Seven Oh Four Instead of Seven Zero Four)

16. Doesn’t forget to complain about the air pollution. Keeps complaining every time he steps out.

15. Says all the distances in Miles (Not in Kilo Meters), and counts in Millions. (Not in Lakhs)

14. Tries to figure all the prices in Dollars as far as possible (but deep inside multiplies by 44).

13. Tries to see the % of fat on the cover of a milk pocket.

12. When he needs to say Z (zed), he never says Z (Zed), instead repeats “Zee” several times, and if the other person is unable to get it, then says X, Y Zee(but never says Zed)

11 . Writes the date in MM/DD/YYYY. On watching traditional DD/MM/YYYY, says “Oh! British Style!!!!”

10. Makes fun of Indian Standard Time and the Indian Road Conditions.

9. Even after 2 months, complaints about “Jet Lag”.

8 . Avoids eating spicy food.

7. Tries to drink “Diet Coke”, instead of Normal Coke. Eats Pizza instead of Dosa.

6. Tries to complain about any thing in India as if he is experiencing it for the first time. Asks questions etc. about India as though its his first visit to India .

5. Pronounces “schedule” as “skejule”, and “module” as “mojule”.

4. Looks suspiciously towards any Hotel/Dhaba food.

Few more important ones:

3.. From the luggage bag, does not remove the stickers of the Airways by which he traveled back to India , even after 4 months of arrival.

2. Takes the cabin luggage bag to short visits in India and tries to roll the bag on Indian Roads.

1. Tries to begin any conversation with “In US ….” or “When I was in US…”



  1. Please respond to mails on Mutiny.. we are waiting for you 🙂

    Comment by vashistvishal — May 22, 2007 @ 3:48 am | Reply

  2. Mommy! that was funny. This will be the strict guideline of things I shudnt do when I get back to India!!

    Comment by Nanyaar? — May 30, 2007 @ 5:24 pm | Reply

  3. Great summation! I’m guilty of one or two of them myself. But some others, particularly Number 3, I’m guilty of even while in US. I just can’t be bothered to remove those tags. Some other tag will take its place in time, or at least that’s my outlook. Glad I found your blog. Will be back later.

    Comment by callmeabookworm — June 23, 2007 @ 12:17 pm | Reply

  4. How things are with you havent heard anything from you ….whats going on..

    Comment by vashistvishal — January 8, 2008 @ 9:26 pm | Reply

  5. Tusi gr8 ho …. 😀 …… i think, One more thing should be added that is the US-returned people use the word “bucks” instead of “Rs.”

    Comment by debudayan — July 9, 2009 @ 3:31 am | Reply

  6. you write well.. where did you disappear?

    Comment by formosacurry — January 15, 2010 @ 10:38 am | Reply

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  8. You forget to mention, “Bless you”, whenever someone sneezes.

    Comment by lonelyindianinus — March 28, 2010 @ 10:50 pm | Reply

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    Comment by James Blair — March 28, 2011 @ 5:41 pm | Reply

  10. Well written.

    Comment by ramanan50 — June 18, 2011 @ 2:23 am | Reply

  11. “Tries to use credit cards in a road side hotel” dats funny

    Comment by Anu Krishna — July 7, 2011 @ 1:57 pm | Reply

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  13. Exceptions….Some comeback specially for roadside/dhaba food…..rest of the observations are precise.

    Comment by Vimal Patel — February 28, 2012 @ 1:32 pm | Reply

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